Caregiving - A Modern DilemmaFamily Comes First

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FAMILY COMES FIRST

Caregiving

A Modern Dilemma 7 VAA të“ COPY

APPEARANCES IN ORDER:

VINCENT J. RUSSO, ESQ. Russo Law Group, P. C.

VICTORIA ROBERTS-DROGIN RuSSO LuaW GrOup , P. C.

NICK DILITLO

CAITLYN JANICKI, Vice President Center for Special Needs Trust Administration

TODD BELISLE, President Center for Special Needs Trust Administration

JANIE CARROLL, RN

RACHEL MORESCO, Recreational Therapist

BRINKEIR

ROSINA CARDINAL, Resident

CHRIS CARDINAL, Social Worker

DANIELLE RANK, Social Worker

FRANK BUQUICCHIO, Esq.

Russo Law Group, P. C.

E’R . ANTHONY STANGANELIT

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RUSSO: Welcome, everyone, to

Family Comes First. I’m Vincent J.

RulSSO.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: And I’m

Victoria Roberts-Drogin. Thank you for

joining us today.

Many of us face the issue of

caring for our parents as they age, and

there are so many decisions to be made.

RUSSO: Yes, it’s truly

difficult for children who are caring for

their parents to determine what’s the

best Care?

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Ye S.
RUSSO: Should it be given at

home or in a nursing home?

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Yes. So,

today we’re going to explore how families

can make those choices, and provide the

best care for their parents.

Caregiving, A Modern Dilemma;

right here on Family Comes First.”

ኧጽ * ❖ (k $r (k (k k

M.S. ROBERTS-DROGIN: We are

talking today about Caring for Our aging

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loved Ones. With us nov is Nick Dilillo Who

is taking care of his mother at home, and

Nick has a story to share with us that is

both heartbreaking and inspirational both

at the same time.

RUSSO: And also joining us

today is Caitlyn Janicki, Vice President

of the Center for Special Needs Trust

Administration. You are near and dear to

my heart, because you run Our Theresa

Pooled Trust, so welcome to both of you.

ROBERTS – DIRIOGIN : Well COme .
DILILLO : Thank you. Thank

you. Pleasure to be here today.

RUSSO: Lots of questions.
ROBERTS-DROGIN : LOtS Of

questions.

RUSSO: Let’s ask about mom.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: Yes, let’s

start with the real life Scenario that

you’re living.

DILILLO: Well, I’ll tell you

the back story of it, first.

When they were married, back in

1967, they got into a serious auto

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accident, my mother and father. They were

hit by a drunk driver, who was in the

country illegally. He was here from

Greece. He jumped ship, and he went to

the Labor Day Tournament that was in

Hicksville at that time in the Mid

Island Plaza back then, which is now the

Broadway Mall in Hicksville.

And, he was on the bleachers, and

he knocked his wife off the bleachers,

while she was pregnant to Wrestle the

keys from her, so he could take her car

and go into Hicksville and become even

more intoxicated than what he was . And,

at around 8:20 at night, my mother and

father and my grandmother, my mother’s

mother, and my mother’s kid sister, she

was fourteen, and my mother was nineteen,

dad was twenty-seven and grandmother was,

she had just turned fifty. He hit them at

eighty miles an hour; he spun the Car

around; the car went into a utility pole;

the gas tank was ripped from the car;

there was an explosion. My mother was

thrown from the car. My father went to

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reach for her. They went to reach for each

Other, and then my father had a scar on

his Wrist, On his hand. And for all

these years he says, every time I look at

it, that scar, it would bring back all

these memories all Over again.

RUSSO: How did it leave your

parents?

DILILLO: Now, my mother was

split from here to here (indicating), and

she has been a seizure Victim in these

years; has a lot of emotional highs and

lows from all of this; memory loss,

short-term memory loss.

My father was thrust underneath

the dashboard. They thought he was a

bundle of rags when they came on the

S Cene . They said, is that a man under

there? What is that under there? They

finally realized it was a man. They

pried the door Open. They got him out.

Thank God, as terrible as what he went

through, and what he suffered, thank God

he went underneath the dashboard and they

got him Out of there, because his leg was

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pushed up inside, busting all the ribs On the

One side.

RUSSO: So, you’ve been a

caregiver for your mom all these years.

DILILLO: All these years with

dad, and all – – – yes.

RUSSO: And what is her

situation now?

DILILLO : Her situation now is

people have asked me, did you ever think

of putting her in an institution. And I

say, listen – – – I say, it’s not about

putting her in an institution. I say,

she is comfortable at home. She’s not

comfortable going into something like

that at this time.

It could come to a point when

she’s older, I still wouldn’t put her in

an institution. I would have somebody

COme to the house to take Care of her,

but at this moment she’s not going to be

tolerant of that right now, and it would

just be too overwhelming for her.

ROBERTS – DIRIOGIN : So, this is a

situation where you really – – – there’s

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a clear answer in your mind; you want to keep

her at home.

DITILLO : Ye S. YeS.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: And you want

to care for her at home.

DILILLO: Absolutely. It’s

from a religious standpoint. I know that

God is calling me to do this. My father

felt that always.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: And you’ve

been doing it.

DILILLO: Yes. And We’ve been

doing it. I feel that Grace every day.

RUSSO: So, as you are taking

care of your mother, there are many

family members taking care of their

parents at home, and there’s a high cost

of Care in New York to be able to do

that.

DILILLO : Right.
RUSSO: And so one of the ways

that many families are able to make this

work is through the Medicaid program, but

they’re not very kind when it comes to

keeping your income .

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ROBERTS – DIRIOGINI: NO .
RUSSO: And SO there’s a

concept called the pooled trust that

allows the Medicaid recipient to use all

their income on their living expenses.

So, Caitlyn, you’re the expert.

Talk to us about the Theresa POOled Trust

and how it can help families.

UANICKI: SO, the Theresa

POOled Income Trust allows for

individuals to take their excess income

and put it into that income trust and

that income can be used towards their

monthly expenses, such as rent, HOA fees,

utilities, personal needs that they have,

and so it allows them to stay at home,

and get the care that they need.

RUSSO: So the excess income

is the amount that’s Over what’s

permitted by Medicaid for the recipient

to keep, and that’s around S900.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Right, so

they don’t have to spend it down. They

can actually get the benefit of it.

RUSSO: Right, because

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1 everyone needs all of their income to be able

2 to – – –

3 MS ROBERTS – DROGIN : Of COUllrSe.

4 MR. RUSSO: – – – stay at home.

5 MS. ROBERTS-DROGIN: Right.

6 MR. RUSSO: And actually more.

7 MR . DITTTO : YeS . YeS –

8 MS, ROBERTS-DROGIN: Ye S.

9 MR. RUSSO: Because of your

1 O paying for other care needs or services.

11 MS ROBERTS-DROGIN: YeS .

12 MR. RUSSO: You need to have the

13 funds.

14 MS. ROBERTS-DROGIN: Right.

15 MR. RUSSO: So the Theresa Pooled

16 Trust helps those families, how does it

17 help the Theresa Foundation?

18 MS. JANTCKI: So, when an

19 individual passes away, their funds aire

2O retained and a donation is made to the

21 Theresa Foundation so that they can run

22 their programs and help the disabled

23 community in New York.

24 MR. RUSSO: So, it’s a win-win

25 Situati On.

る幼リざ至三ーる

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Absolutely.

the good goes all the way around.

RUSSO: Ye S. YeS.
ROBERTS – DIRIOGIN : It helps mom

stay at home.

JANICKI: Right.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: And it allows

for charitable work.

RUSSO: So, we only have like

fifteen se conds, Which I hate to do to

УOu .

DIT ILLO : Okay. It ” S all

right.

RUSSO: But just mention your

artwork real quickly because I know

that’s been a part of the way you’re

being able to keep mom at home.

DILILLO: Yes. Absolutely,

yes. Well, I do a lot of religious work,

but I also do movie stars, landscapes,

cityscapes. I do the whole thing. I do

a lot of stuff in pastels. I also paint

in acrylics, in Oils, but it’s mainly

pastels because it’s more economical for

myself and also more economical for

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people who are buying.

RUSSO: So you paint at home?
DILILTO: Yes, the Studio is

at home, at the house.

RUSSO : And so you’re able to

raise additional monies and it allows you

to continue to keep your – – –

DILILLO : Yes.
RUSSO : – – – mother at home.

What a loving child you are.

DILILLO: Well, I couldn’t

have asked for a better mother and

father, so I mean, they were my greatest

gift.

RUSSO: God bless you. SO

want to thank both of you for being on

tOday .

JANICKI: Thank you.
RUSSO: And in particular, the

sponsorship of the Center for Special

Needs Trust Administration sponsoring

Family Comes First.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Ye S.
RUSSO: We’re going to have

more shows this year because of your

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Organization.

UANICKI : WOnderful.
RUSSO: And, Nick, just keep

doing it. You’re a loving Son.

DILILLO: Thank you. Thank

you. Thank you so much. It’s a pleasure

to be here.

RUSSO: Okay.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: It S a

pleasure to have both of you. Wonderful.

We’re going to take a break and we

will be right back with Family Comes

First.

BELISLE: Hi. 7 m TOCC

Belisle, the President of the Center for

Special Needs Trust Administration.

At the Center, we understand the

importance of helping individuals, family

members and loved ones secure independent

lifestyles. We are the nation’s leading

provider in trust administration services

with regards to pooled trust, Community

trust, third-party trust and special

needs trustS.

The Center also offers specific

services for Medicare recipients who are

receiving settlement proceeds. If you’d

like to find out what the Center can do

for you and your loved one, please

ኧ: (k k ኧ ኧ: k ኧ: ኧጽ

RUSSO: Welcome back to Family

Comes First. We just heard from Nick

Dilillo on how he is coping with caring

for his mother and Caitlyn Janicki of the

advantages of the pooled trust.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: A lot Of

information there.

RUSSO: Yes, Sure.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: Sometimes,

though, Vincent, a loved one requires

more care than can be provided at home.

One such place which provides care

is Our Lady of Consolation Nursing and

Rehabilitative Caire Center in West Islip .

Let’ s take a look.

k . . . . . . k.

CARROLL : Our Lady of

Consolation has a very good reputation.

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It’s family orientated. It’s in the area

where I live, and I’ve always heard very

good things about Our Lady of

Consolation, and I am proud to Say I work

here.

My duties, I’m a registered nurse,

I administer meds, I have contact with

the doctors, the families, patient

education. We get involved in pretty

much everything. We feed the patients.

We help out the nursing assistants, we

work with recreation therapy, all the

different departments. Everybody works

together.

MORESCO: I’m a recreation

therapist. I do programs for the

resident, such as baking, trivia, bingo,

horse racing, Current events. I

implement Wii, that they enjoy, such as

Jeopardy and bowling. We have a bowling

league downstairs that they do. So I try

to incorporate what they would do if they

were home and bring it into their home

here.

BRINKER: There’ s a priority

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to the day, but basically the day revolves

around daily mass at 10:30, and then I

see the new admissi Ons .

And then the Staff are COmfortable

enough to make referrals, so I get to see

the referrals, and then I walk around. I

walk around to all the different

communities. The residents here, they’re

just the joy of my life. They’re just

wonderful people to be with, and we all

have our moments, you know?

Sometimes I Can come in Cranky

God forbid, but that sometimes happens.

I know that there are different moods,

the different days; weather has a

traumatic impact on people’s lives, but

they’re just wonderful people to be with.

CARROLL : They’re like family.

They’re like family. They have their

friends. They socialize. Between the

residents, the staff, all the different

departments, it’s like One big family.

CARDINAL: The last time I

fell, I was sitting at the kitchen and my

wheeler, and the thing Slipped Out from

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under me, and I went down, and everything

came up and everything went down. I

broke two more vertebrae; one in the

lower spine almost in the end, and One in

my shoulder. But, I’ve got a very bad

back bone. It’s all split, you know?

It’s Cracked.

So, I saw the x-rays of them, and

I says, Oh, boy. I’m in bad shape. So I

said, when I came here, I decided to

stay, because there’s no one at home

during the daytime. How do I like living

here? I like it. As I said, it’s very

nice. They’re very nice to me. The

aides are all nice; even the nurses are

nice. I pick On them all, and they pick

on me, so they’re very, very good. Very

gOOd.

MORESCO: The patients are

great. They’re very friendly. We treat

them as if they’re Our Own relatives.

They always bring a smile to my face. I

know we bring a smile to their face.

They always look for the current events

that are on the board, Such as the

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programs, and they always look forward to

what we have to Offer them.

CARDINAL: They’re making

Cookies. Chocolate cookies. Mm-mm.

She made Cinnamon rolls the other

day, last week and Oh, they were good. I

haven’t had a Cinnamon roll in years.

CARROLL : Father Brian who

currently is the priest here, the

residents look forward to going to mass

every week to see him, and he’s wonderful

with the families and the residents.

The spiritual aspect is very

important. The families are very

involved. A lot of families do Come in

on Sundays to take the residents,

accompany them to mass. We have

volunteers that bring the residents down,

and Sunday mass is One thing that the

residents do all lOOk forward to.

MORESCO: I know if they don’t

have mass some days, they’re

disappointed. They do go to the Chapel

almost every day, most of the residents,

and they do enjoy going very much. In

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fact, Father Brian is very friendly and very

involved in their Caire .

BRINKER: I think the

spiritual aspect here is very important,

because it speaks to another era, where

the residents are coming from. There’s

really a wonderful connection between the

church and the residents, because it was

so part of their life, and here that’s

just amplified, because it’s of that age.

It’s a win-win situation for both

the residents and myself. I love being a

priest, and I love being a priest to the

residents, and they love seeing me, so

it’s really a very good match.

k k . . . . .

MS .. ROBERTS – IDROGIN : With u S InOW

to tell us her story is Chris Cardinal

and Danielle Rank, who are both Social

workers at Our Lady of Consolation

Rehabilitation and Nursing Center.

Welcome to you both.

RUSSO : Welcome.
ROBERTS – DIRIOGIN : We’re SO

happy to have you here, thank you.

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RUSSO: Great to have you, I

mean, because in the first segment we

talked about home care services, and how

to keep mom Safe and at home.

But, you know the reality as social

WOrkers, that SOme Of Our Seniors need a

higher level of care.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: At some point.
RUSSO: Yes. And if they need

that level of care, often a nursing

facility is the appropriate place.

SO, let’s talk about what you do,

why you do what you do and how you better

the lives Of Seni Ors .

SO, Chris, you’ve got your mother

in-law.

C. CARDINAL: Yes. My mother-in

law is there.

RUSSO: Residing there.
C. CARDINAI : For about a year

RUSSO: Her first name?
C. CARDINAL : IS ROSina .
RUSSO: Rosina. Okay. So,

how’s that, working in the place that your

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mother-in-law is in? Is that reas suring to

you?

C. CARDINAL: Actually, it is.

I can see her every day. She comes down

to my office to visit.

УOu.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: That’ s So nice .
RUSSO :

She’s checking up on

C. CARDINAL: Yes, she does. If

she needs anything,

RUSSO :

we’re right there.

And you shared with me

that you had your mother home – – – your

mother-in-law – –

C. CARDINAL: Mother-in-law.
RUSSO :

– – – home with you for?

C. CARDINAL: Eighteen years.
RUSSO :

Eighteen years.

MS, ROBERTS-DROGIN: Ye S.

RUSSO:

bless you.

a lot when

to me,

So, first of all, God

C. CARDINAL: Yes, she helped me
RUSSO :

my kids were young.

Right.

C. CARDINAL: She was a GOC Send

actually.

We got along very well.

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ROBERTS-DROGIN: That’s

wonderful.

C. CARDINAL: It was a very hard

transition for us when she decided to

stay. It was her decision to stay.

RUSSO: And she decided; which

is so interesting, right?

C. CARDINAL: Uh-huh.
RUSSO: And, why?
C. CARIDINAL : I think part of it

was that she could not get Out as she used

to before. She used to have a scooter.

She used to go around the neighborhood.

She couldn’t do that as much anymore. She

couldn’t get up and down the Stairs

without assistance; different thing S.

RUSSO: My mother-in-law, Ruby,

she lived with us for about eight years,

and there was a certain amount of

isolation being in our home, and she

wasn’t ambulatory in a way that she could

leave the house.

And so now, she’s in a nursing

facility in South Carolina, and there’s

interaction, there’s at least something

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always going On for her to go to .

ROBERTS – DIROGIN : It’ S. a.

Community.

RUSSO: And then there’s lunch

in the cafeteria and interaction, so

social work becomes really important in

that regard.

So, Danielle, you do that stuff,

don’t you?

ROBERTS-DROGIN: What’s your

favorite part of what you do for the

patients?

RANK: Just being able to meet

them and kind of hear their background and

their stories and where they came from.

And like you said, it’s very uncommon for

the patients themselves to say that they

want to stay long-term, but some actually

do and trying to help with that transition

and having the family understand that

maybe this is what is in the best interest

for their families.

RUSSO: Ye S.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: So, that’s

interesting. Sometimes you sense it and

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the patients sense it.

RANK: Yes. I’ve had patients

tell their families that they would like

to stay.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: That must be

hard for the families.

RANK: Yes. So, we give them

support in that way to help them kind of

understand where their parent or their

loved one is coming from.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Right.
RUSSO: And then. On the other

hand, I’m sure you see many families

where, quite frankly, the nursing home is

scary. You know, they’ve never been in a

nursing home. They hear these horror

stories, and they think that’s the way it

is in reality and you know better, because

you work in a quality facility. That’s

not a horror story for SOmeone to be in a

nursing home.

So, do you get into those

conversations? The educating the family

and getting them to feel comfortable?

RANK: Yes. I believe everyone

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always has their doubts and beliefs of what

they’ve heard from other facilities and

things along those lines, but just being

available and providing that support and

extending the services and offer the

meetings if they need a meeting with the

team just to discuss progress and

everything that’s going On and answer any

questions or concerns that they might

have.

ROBERTS-IDROGIN : YeS.
RANK: I feel that that

definitely helps ease those doubts that

the family members may have.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Right. And

seeing the Care.

RANK: Right.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: And seeing that

someone is happy and enjoys the Community

Of a meall or feels Cared for, I think all

of that probably goes a long way.

RUSSO: Absolutely.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: You know,

change is scary, and the unknown is scary.

MS . C. CARDINAIL : YeS . The

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transition is difficult for both.

ROBERTS – DIRIOGIN : Yes, right.

But, once you have more information about

it and you actually see what happens,

that’s why it was so wonderful to see the

video because you actually see inside.

RUSSO: Right.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: And it’s

lovely.

RUSSO: Now, your role is a

little different than Danielle’s.

C. CARDINAL: I’m actually the

performance improvement director.

RUSSO: You say that with a

smile.

IMS … C … CARDINAT : I do. I like my

job very much.

RUSSO: That’s great.
C. CARDINAL: We lOOk at

everything that we do On a Continual

basis. The team works very well together,

all the disciplines. We plan for improved

strategies.

Right now, for the last couple of

years, we’re working On managing behavior

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without medication. We’ve developed a lot

of initiatives not to medicate people and

learn other ways of managing behavior. We

work on that every day.

RUSSO: So, let me ask you a

practical questi On.

I’m a child of a parent who, I

believe, is going to need nursing home

Caire . I know nothing about the System. I

don’t know which nursing home would be

appropriate Or not appropriate.

What could you recommend to that, to

me, so that I could educate myself better

as to Choosing the appropriate nursing

home.

C. CARDINAL: I think it’s

important to visit a nursing home On more

than One occasion at different times of

the day, see how available and Open the

facility is to giving you a tour when you

walk in the dOOr.

And there’s a website that compares

nursing facilities also; it’s

Medicare. gov, and it’s nursing home

compare, and you can see some background

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On their quality measures, their Staffing,

how they’ve done on annual department

surveys, what issues they’ve had. The

survey results have to be posted in the

facility, so it’s an opportunity for you

to look at those.

RUSSO : SlUllre .
C. CARDINAL: And have the

facility explain to you what their issues

were and what they did about them.

RUSSO: Ye S.
C. CARDINAL: I think your

opening there, On the ground, you have to

go and Visit.

C. CARDINAL: Yes, you do.
RUSSO: Take a tour.
C. CARDINAL: Yes, you do.
RUSSO: And better yet, do it

before there’s a Crisis.

You know, so like if I know mom and

dad aren’t doing so great, and maybe

there’s going to be a time, why not do it

then; go Out and Visit a few nursing

homes, ask the questions, SO that Way if

there is a problem later On, you’re not in

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a crisis trying to figure Out what to do.

C. CARDINAL : When there’ S a

hospital stay, they give you so many days

and then your loved One is going to be

di Scharged, and these are yOur OptiOnS.

RUSSO: And, Danielle, you’re

involved, I would think, with the families

when someone comes Out of rehab, those

initial days, whether they could be

discharged home or whether they’re going

to need to stay in extended Caire .

RANK: Right. It’s normally a

team kind of decision along with the

families. We discuss the progress, their

physical limitations and abilities,

medical and the needs that they may need

sometimes. We do a great amount of

discharge home. We also do have a few

that do stay long-term, but it really all

depends on the level of care and what

really the family could take On.

RUSSO: Well, thank you so much.

I mean, that went SO qui Cik. I have a lot

more questions for Danielle, and I Can’t

ask them. Another time, you’ll have to

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COme back.

C. CARDINAL : There you go.
RUSSO: Thank you so much.
C. CARDINAL : Thank you.
ROBERTS-DROGIN: Thank you, and

thank you. So much for sharing all the

information about such an important

6 SOULTC6 .

RUSSO: So, now we’re going to

take a break and we’ll be right back on

Family Comes First.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Joining us now

is an elder care attorney, Frank

Bucquicchio, a partner in your law firm, to

di S Cuss with us how families Can figure

out how to make these choices for mom and

dad when it becomes apparent that they

either have to come back home, but they’ll

need help or be in a facility.

RUSSO: And he’s going to have

all the answers.

MS . ROEERTS-DROGIN : Of COurSe .

Always.

RUSSO: And then we have Father

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Tony Stanganelli with us, spiritual advisor

to many families in the Community who are

stressing out, trying to deal and Cope

with caring for a loved One.

Welcome. It’s great to have both of

УOu .

STANGANELLI : Thank you .
BUQUICCHIO: Thank you very

Imuch.

RUSSO: SO, let’s start with

Frank. How do you advise the families?

BUQUICCHIO: Well, I think the

first step is what level of Care is going

to be needed? That’s the most important,

so, is the parent going to be able to Call

a spouse, if it’s a married Couple, going

to be able to come home with care, or

worst case, need nursing home care.

As a planner, I like to, Obviously,

plan for the worst, and hope for the best.

RUSSO: Good idea.
BUQUICCHIO: So, I would like

for the families to be, if it is a nursing

home, if that’s going to be the worst case

scenario, from a financial standpoint

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discuss what those Options are, just in case

it ends up being that, and if they can

come home with help, we’ll talk about that

as well, of Course, being the best Case

scenario, because of course everybody

would like to stay home, I think, longer.

ROBERTS — DROGIN : And SOmetimes II

think it’s on a spectrum. You could start

out at home, but you have to anticipate

that things Could change.

BUQUICCHIO: Right, and

depending on the nature of the illness, it

may not be getting better. It may be

something that progressively worsens and

they do need long-term nursing home care,

and this way they’re better prepared for

it in that Situation.

And home Care, you know, Staying

home, it’s a little bit tricky, because

Medicaid has very strict rules and the

income piece in particular is problematic

because Medicaid has very strict rules as

to how much income you could keep, and if

you’re over those limits that becomes a

problem, but there are ways.

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Page 32

RUSSO: That’s right. We heard

about that from Caitlyn Janicki and the

Theresa Pooled Trust.

BUQUICCHI: Exactly.
RUSSO: Let’s show a brochure Of

the Theresa Pooled Trust, and this would

be a trust that would allow the in COme to

be protected.

BUQUICCHI: Yes.
RUSSO: And allow the loved One

to stay at home.

BUQUICCHI: Right. Which works

phenomenally. Yes.

RUSSO: And then, Frank, also

you know, what, just quickly, what

documents, legal documents, should be in

place for Ongoing decision making, if mom

or dad are incapacitated?

BUQUICCHI: It’s going to be

critical to have a durable power of

attorney and health care proxy.

RUSSO: Okay.
BUQUICCHI: Because if mom or

dad or spouse are unable to make decisions

for themselves, legally there’s nobody

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1 O

that can do that for them, especially

financial matters so that’s where the

power of attorney and health care proxy

are going to be very important.

RUSSO: Right. And Father, our

guests, Nick Dilillo and caring for his

Imom at home and Chris with her mother-in

law in a nursing home, share your

insights.

STANGANELLI : Well, it always

seems to me that dealing with the changes

that come with advanced age and

anticipating those changes can be such an

incredibly mental burden; How am I going

to handle this – – – on both sides, both

the caregiver, as well as the aging

parent.

ROBERTS – DIRIOGIN : Yel S; .
STANGANELILI : And yet, the grace

Of God is always there. I find in all of

these moments when we’re anticipating

change or trying not to stress out, making

those decisions and realizing that, Oh,

how can I do this right? But God is there

giving us the grace, and that was one of

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the beautiful things that Nick shared with

us, is he made the decision to keep his

mom at home.

RUSSO: Right.
STANGANELLI : That he really

believed that the grace was there for him

to be able to sustain that lifestyle and

to do what was necessary to ensure a

quality of life for his mom.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: He had a lot of

strength from his faith, I think he said,

yes.

RUSSO: Absolutely. Nick and

Chris are a great example of the love and

bond we share with Our parents.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Yes, and the

resourcefulness to figure Out a way to

provide for them at home, and ultimately,

if needed, provide for them in a facility.

RUSSO: Right. There could be a

lot of creative options.

ROBERTS-DROGIN: Absolutely.

Absolutely.

For a list Of SOme Of the Se

resources and options, you can visit

(

Page 35 Vincent’s law firm at WJRussol law. Com. 家

RUSSO: Always love to help.
ROBERTS – DROGIN : YeS
RUSSO: Thanks to all Our

viewers for joining us, and remember,

family truly does come first.

Our faith tells us we are not alone and that we travel together with OUR GOD through difficult times
—Monsignor James C. Vlaun

Caregiving – A Modern Dilemma

Special Comment from Vincent